Decisions of an American mother in Africa

What do we do about preschool for my 2 year old? He is still in a in diaper which is a bit of an issue. Most other women here with our company would not have their children in something that early because their focus would be totally on their home. However my son wants and needs interaction with other children more than I am able to visit others, especially since having his sister. I also know when I begin teaching in the schools again; my time will be even more limited. So how do I get my son what he needs? I have checked out some preschools here and find myself in a bit of a predicament. Some are inexpensive but full, so that does no good. I do not want to look like I have money to throw around. I also am not looking for great teaching as much as socialization for my son, because I feel he is learning a lot at home. Some are more expensive but have availability and will change his diapers. Others that are farther away are better, but it makes it not so convenient and I don’t know how much those are. So what do I do? For those in the states, how much you ask are these preschools? The one I wanted at first that is full is roughly 20 dollars for signing up and 14 dollars a month. The one that is more expensive and has a class just for William’s age is 40 dollars up front and 30 dollars a month. I can hear the gasps already all the way from here. Decisions, decisions!!

What do I do to best care for my newborn daughter? To preface his section, I must remind you that to tell someone what they should do for their child is to show concern. That said, I got instructed by an older lady in the proper way to hold my child when breastfeeding yesterday. I did it the way she said rather than arguing, but I felt like I was going to drop Mariama the whole time. She asked if I was scared to nurse. I said no, when the real thing is I am nervous about doing it in front of them because I do get instructions. To reassure everyone that heard my story from the village, I did take this better than the 13 year old last year telling me what my child needed. Here they shave the babies head, though I am not sure of the reasoning for this. I have already told some neighbors that we will not be doing that. I just figure she looks cute the way she is. So after the breastfeeding lesson, the daughters of his lady were telling me I needed to pencil in eyebrows for her. Now this was something new to hear, but once again Mariama is cute the way she is. Plus it is easier to pencil in for them because they can use a black pencil. Have you ever tried to match eyebrow color? Have you tried for a light newborn? Have you tried looking for one in Africa? I have tried looking here for me and it is impossible! Patience, patience!

My baby delivery in Africa--not for the faint of heart

Now as this post title suggests, this is not for the faint of heart, or even for those who plan to give birth some day. But because some of you have asked what it was really like, I will share it, but consider yourselves forewarned.
We went Thursday morning and, as we anticipated, the doctor wanted to induce. So he said we would do the IV of oxytocin for half an hour to one hour and see where we were at, i.e. if there was any progression. By the way I hate needles, and IVs fall under the needle category. They asked if I wanted an epidural, and I said I wanted to wait to see if this was really going to take before bringing more needles. After about an hour, he saw there was no change and so dismissed us thinking it might trigger something in the next few days or we would try again until we had a baby on Monday. So we came home and gathered our things to attend our team meeting that was already in progress. I continued to have some contractions right up through lunch, after which they ceased. So after the meeting, we went to a movie night at Dakar Academy, the boarding school here in Dakar for Americans mostly. I ate too much, which I would pay for later, but we had an enjoyable time. Most people were surprised to see us there expecting us to be having the baby. After we got home that night, William was distressed by not seeing us much of the day and so we were letting him lay in our bed for a while. This turned out to be a really bad idea when about midnight I began having extremely intense contractions. Going from no contractions to immediately strong ones drove me to the bathroom throwing up. I was scared and in pain which scared Rich, in turn causing a very concerned William. But within the the next two hours Rich got a hold of a friend of ours who came over to watch William so we could go to the hospital.
About 2:00 we arrive at the hospital, but the delivery rooms were full. So I was put in another room and given an IV of Spasfon to help relax me and the contractions, which wound up stopping the contractions altogether. Then a little after 7:30 the doctor came and made sure I was moved over to a delivery room and the induction was restarted as the day before, but the doctor said we would not stop until we had a baby. During the delivery, they had someone go purchase the pads I would need, which is different from what I had heard. I quickly agreed to get the epidural because of what I had heard about the delivery process here. Did I mention I don't like needles? So the contractions were lessened by the epidural but it did not completely take, so I was still able to feel much of what was going on. It is true that they do not provide a robe as they do in the states, but I did have a sheet over me most of the time. So that was not much different from the states as I remember. Worse than the contractions though is how they prepare the birth canal for the baby to come through. It speeds up the process because the baby's head does not do all the work, but it is painful because it is the midwife pressing from the inside---and I will leave it at that. It was excruciating! I had not been warned about this part of the delivery. Anyway, contractions got to where they needed to be and baby was in place for pushing, but the midwives said to wait on the doctor. I said he had better hurry then! He came and said push, which I was more than happy to do by this time. Unfortunately because of the epidural, the main muscles I felt I had control over were my chest muscles, which is not where I needed to push from. The midwives helped me to push by pressing on my stomach, which I had been warned about. But after everything else combined with the epidural, this was nothing. We also found out the reason they do the pressing is because the doctor does not use the forceps. The doctor tried to avoid doing an episiotomy as well, but he could not. Finally the head came out---Yea! But then concern arose as he unwound the umbilical cord that had gotten around her neck five times and knotted. Rich saw the knot, but all I saw was the unravelling that did not seem to end. I was anxious for her to be fully delivered then, so that she could be checked out. They quickly took her out of the room to the neonatal check point, which I told Rich to follow her to make sure she was ok. Rich returned saying it was her cry I heard, she was fine, and they were just cleaning her up. All of this happened before 1:00 in the afternoon! The doctor said he felt the epidural slowed it down, but it was all still fast to me. As he had unraveled her umbilical cord, he said to Rich how lucky this little girl was, but we know that it was nothing short of the hand of God protecting our little one. Thank you for each prayer offered up on our behalf as they were very much felt!
So that's it, Mariama's delivery in Dakar! The rest of the hospital care was wonderful and I got to get some rest, as many of you instructed me to do. Everything I needed for me or Mariama was provided except clothes and diapers for her. I was dismissed on Tuesday, which was just in time, because Rich can be a pitiful mess without me here. I am so blessed with a wonderful husband, a strong son who loves his baby sister, and a healthy baby girl that is just beautiful! Thank You God for how You have blessed my life!!!!!